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Who Is Rebecca Black?

Posted by on March 14, 2011 at 3:00 PM EST

rebecca blackWho is Rebecca Black and why should I care?

Ladies and gentlemen we would all like you to meet the next Miley Cyrus, Rebecca Black. With a little bit of money and a crapload of self-esteem, you too could become the next pop music ICON! I am really pissed that I hadn’t stumbled upon this teen sensation music factory earlier in my life; I could be freaking Justin Bieber right now…I hate the world at the moment in time.

It turns out that Rebecca Black is receiving A LOT of attention for all the WRONG reasons. Black is a young tween who dreamed of becoming a super star. Her parents feared that if their daughter did not get her way, she would turn into a depressed sociopath who refused to leave her room. Fear not because Rebecca Black has hit superstar status with a little help from Ark Music Factory. Overnight Black has received more attention than Lindsay Lohan on a weeklong cocaine bender.

Right now Rebecca Black and her music video “Friday” is being laughed at by the entire WORLD. I pray to god that this was a joke to show everyone that all it takes is a little bit of money to produce a viral hit. The lyrics to Black’s song are AWFUL but hey, they music video looks top notch. I even love the use of the PROP black rapper; a girl’s gotta have street cred, right?

For all of you wondering who in the world Rebecca Black is, now you know. She is a nobody who has now become famous by making a fool of herself…kind of like Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton. Regardless, I can’t wait for the next Rebecca Black video to hit YouTube, maybe the title can be: “Rich Girl with Too Much Money.”

 

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  1. Holy crap. Kids these days are so uncreative and shallow. My ears and eyes are bleeding.

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