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Charlie Sheen Space Shuttle Discovery Wake Up Call

Posted by on March 7, 2011 at 2:01 PM EST

charlie sheen discoveryIf Charlie Sheen were William Shatner…he’d be waking up the Space Shuttle Discovery.

William Shatner woke the crew of the Space Shuttle Discovery today, as Star Trek music played in the background. Shatner’s message was pretty standard; he praised the space travellers for their hard work and for making strides in the realm of space exploration.

But can you imagine what the message would be like if it was penned by Charlie Sheen? I imagine it would read something like this:

“Wake up, space cadets! It’s morning. What’re you going to make of your day? Are you going to be a High Priest Vatican Warlock, or are you going to be like every other Joe Schmo who works his sorry butt off just to come home to stuff his face full of McDonalds and sleep in front of the television? #winnint is important, especially when you’re in space.”

5 hours later Charlie Sheen to Space Shuttle Discovery:

“… Take me for instance. I may be unemployed, but right now I have over 2 million followers on Twitter. Since you’re in space, I presume you have tiger blood coursing through your veins right now. If you don’t, too bad, but if you do, you have to use it, and work with it. By the way, how much is NASA actually paying you guys? Because honestly, if you’re risking your lives and earning less than $3 million per flight, that’s kind of sub par. I wouldn’t take that. But that’s just me. I’m a winner.”

Should Sheen be next in line to wake up the Space Shuttle Discovery astronauts? I think he’s the perfect candidate. What do you think?



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