Jersey Shore Episode 1: Snooki Will Attack You Like A Squirrel Monkey!
Jersey Shore Season 3 Episode 1 aired last night and Snooki attacks like a squirrel monkey.
Jersey Shore aired last night and Snooki threatened to attack Sammi like a squirrel monkey. Yeah, those are her exact words and unfortunately I sat through the entire Jersey shore Season 3 premiere so I could bring you this recap. In case you missed it let me give you a breakdown of what happened with your favorite spray-tanned stars.
Last season the Jersey Shore clan invaded Miami and had one hell of a time. Friendships were broken and Angelina left the show. Going into last night’s Season 3 premiere, Sammi and Ronnie were still dating but were not talking to Snooki and J-WoWW. Of course this is going to cause drama right from the get go; we will get to that in a minute.
Sammi and Ronnie are the first to arrive at the Seaside Heights house, where it all began. Next up was Jenni Farley (J-WoWW) and as she walked up the stairs to see Sammi, she turned right back around in disgust, not saying a word. Next on the arrival list was Vinny and then came Pauly D. J-WoWW was happy when she saw that Snooki had arrived, but wait a minute, the bright orange Jersey Shore hamster had multiplied! Ladies and gentlemen meet Deena Nicole Cortese, the newest reject to join the cast.
Last but not least to arrive at the house is Mike Sorrentino (The Situation) and he isn’t too happy when he finds out he has to room with Sammi and Ronnie. The night goes on and your typical Jersey Shore antics ensue. Drinks are flowing and the hot tub is going as the cast mates get reacquainted with one another. The Situation goes off with Deena to find her lost cowboy hat and he ends up seeing her naked as she was completely annihilated and decided to just take her clothes off.
Before the striptease though, Vinny, Snooki and Deena are all in the hot tub and Deena is making a move on Vinny. Snooki gets all bent out of shape and whines that Vinny just hooked up with one of her best friends and she doesn’t want him hooking up with Deena too. Somebody please slap some sense into Vinny and let him know he can do a whole hell of a lot better than those two gremlin looking chicks.
Jersey Shore ends with Deena Nicole Cortese walking up to where The Situation is laying down (Sammi and Ronnie are in there as well). Sammi laughs at something Deena says and the chaos begins. Deena quickly waddles like a drunken penguin downstairs and starts talking shit. Sammi is just laughing it off upstairs but once Ronnie hears his name, its game over. His roid rage kicks in and both he and Sammi run down stairs to let Deena have a piece of their mind.
An arguing match ensues between Deena Nicole Cortese and Sammi, then Snooki chimes in like a little rabid hamster. She says that she will “attack you like a squirrel monkey,” whatever that means. Of course, in the background is J-WowW and she has to get her 2 cents in. The first episode of Jersey Shore Season 3 ends with Sammi and Jenni getting into a fist fight and it looks like J-WoWW misses with every single punch.
Tune in next week as the Jersey Shore Season 3 returns on Thursday night at 10|9c on MTV.
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